Archive of UserLand's first discussion group, started October 5, 1998.

Re: Taking myself less seriously

Author:Vincent Outlaw
Posted:9/11/2000; 3:33:12 PM
Topic:fork
Msg #:21199 (In response to 21195)
Prev/Next:21198 / 21200

I totally connected to the thread of berating one's self and appreciated the suggestions for how to deal with that by letting the context-self tell the berated-self that the berating-self is out of line. 3 selves...wow.

I've never really gotten into the significance of place in the sibling hierarchy, although I've heard of it many times. Do you know of any web-resources that would bring a little more understanding to this 2nd of 4?

This all is pretty timely in that I had a really strange experience dropping by almost-3 off a pre-school today. He stood next to me at the open gate to his play area, with all his boy/gril (girl to us) buddies playing away, very hesitant to enter this place he's at more than he's at home. He loves the place...I think. But today he hesitated a little longer. Didn't want to enter the fray, or was taking it all in, or something. He asked me to pick him up and carry him in. He needed something and he must have got it because when we got in his room to drop off the lunch box/backpack, he was out the door and off to play the minute I put him down. I couldn't help but flash on how I am when I'm on the edge of people I know...jump in or jump out. And it's usually jump out unless I'm seen and am expected to jump in.

The point is that I'm seeing these things in my son that I can totally relate to after all of my years of experience (compared to his very few years). How much of this all is just me, how much is all of my experiences (especially with my family), and how much am I passing on (good and bad, according to my current self) to the little man?

The other point is that I really can't wait to go pick him up and see how his day went.

Just relatin'....VO


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